Close to Nowhere - Linda Jones


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Close to Nowhere
By Linda Jones

Technology is out to get me

• I love technology, but sometimes, I think it’s out to get me.

When I got my first iPhone, I was having trouble getting it to do “something,” I can’t remember what. I asked Jess, Barbara’s daughter for help, as she has an iPhone also. She couldn’t fix it.

So, I called AT&T for help. One of the first things he asked was how was it plugged into the computer. I checked the connection and lo and behold, I didn’t have it plugged into the computer. I had it plugged into the power strip instead of the USB port. I moved the plug to the right port and voilá, it immediately began working. I just told the guy that plugging it directly into the computer had worked.

Not too long ago, here at work, I changed the black ink cartridge on the printer by my desk and it immediately quit working. I emailed back and forth with Kodak a couple days and finally gave up and called them.

Doing absolutely nothing different than what I’d been doing (except the power had gone out) as soon as I was going to read the little guy from India the error message, it printed. First time in days. Now, when I change the ink cartridge, I unplug the printer from everything. But I was really embarrassed when I had to tell the little guy from India that oh, never mind, it’s working now.

I broke down a month or so ago and bought a Kindle Fire (Angry Birds is great on it!).

Sunday afternoon, it worked fine. Sunday evening, bedtime, reading time, it would not come on. OK, battery’s dead? Wrong. Charged it all night, still wouldn’t come on. Fooled and fooled with it — still wouldn’t come on, even following instructions on website exactly.

So, I broke down and called. You’ll never guess. The girl told me what to do and I said “I’ve been doing that for two days now.” Then, I did what she said and voilá, the Kindle Fire logo popped right up in the window.

I think I give up...

• Honky Tonk came to church Sunday morning! He’s been a lot on Saturdays, for donkey rides, etc., but never “in” church.

Pastor Doug has been preaching on Revelation and the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse and when he said a surprise was coming and I knew Sonny and Marion were bringing the surprise, I figured it out! One of the Horsemen!

Of course, I was wrong. A cowboy song burst into the service and here came our Connect group leader on Honky Tonk, “rounding up” folks for Connect groups.

You just gotta love a preacher that uses donkeys!

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