| The Preacher’s Corner By Rev. Dr. Milton Winter Grandmotherhood is a rewarding career I
grew up in a good, basic Mississippi household. We had what we needed,
and we did not think much about the luxuries of life. Most other people
were like us. I did not know any really rich people, so that the
temptation to crave and yearn for the things lots of money can buy did
not trouble my young mind. Sure, I wanted that
big, shiny Lionel model train locomotive in the catalog, but it cost,
maybe, $20. I knew that was impossible, even for Santa Claus, so I was
content to admire the picture, and let that be that. I
was especially blessed because my grandmother (mother’s mother) was
part of our household, so that I was never without a family member at
home to watch over me. That made me “rich,” although at the time I just
took it for granted that all children were surrounded by loving
grandmothers like mine. Grandmother presided over
our kitchen. She was the specialty cook. Born on a farm along the
Missouri River in 1879, she was the eldest of six siblings — all of
whom lived into their 90s. Grandmother lived to
96. She and my grandfather moved to Mississippi in 1926, bringing with
them three children — the fourth, and eldest, my Uncle Bill, was
already in college at the University of Missouri. I
am quite sure that nobody ever asked my grandmother if she preferred
the calling to be wife and mother over, say — say a career in the big
city. She lived before such options were even a
possibility, except for the adventuresome few, and so I doubt my
grandmother ever raised such questions in even her own mind. Her life’s
path followed very closely that of her mother, that of her sister, and
of all the female relatives in her family. She
and my grandfather grew up on adjacent farms. They attended the same
one-room school. Grandmoth-er said she advanced quickly in the little
school because she would listen as the older children repeated their
lessons. When she married my grandfather, who
was a college professor and dean, she read widely and taught herself,
so that she could perform her responsibilities in the academic circles
in which he moved. Grandmother’s presence brought
an atmosphere of cultivated domesticity into our home that I can best
compare to the character of “Aunt Bea” played in Andy Griffith’s
Mayberry. My grandmother was not as assertive as Bea Taylor, but could
certainly cook as well. I did not ponder upon any
of this until I went off to college, and the way it came home to me
still brings a smile. When packing to move into the dormitory, I went
to the closet in our home where the sheets and towels were stored, and
got a few things off the top of the stack. It
was only later, when I made up my bed at the dorm, that I was greeted
with laughter and teasing by the other fellows who, I realized to my
great embarrassment, had not been sent off with embroidered sheets and
pillowcases! My grandmother, you see, was deft at
all kinds of sewing and needlework. She would cross-stitch any item
that would hold still for the treatment. Our
house had crocheted doilies on every table, beautifully decorated
hand-towels — every pillowcase and sheet got the “treatment,” and
grandmother even crocheted beautiful, full-sized lace tablecloths for
each of her daughters and daughters-in-law. If she was sitting, she was doing some sort of handwork. I had never even thought about the fact that all of our family’s sheets and pillowcases had lace attached! Needless
to say, when I realized that this was a masculine faux-pas, I quickly
ducked out to the dollar store and bought a set of garish green-striped
sheets in good ’70s college style. There are
still a few of my grandmother’s embroidered items in my linen closet.
Now they are too precious to use. Besides that, they would have to be
ironed after washing. I love the advances of
recent times -- air-conditioning, permanent press, color television, my
laptop computer and cell phone — things my grandmother never had. But
there are aspects of life that passed with her generation — a sort of
gentleness about life and pleasant additions to the home. Things
in our economy have changed to the point that most families need
everybody working outside the home just to get by. But it was my
grandmother’s “little” touches — actually they took hard work, for
which she received no financial compensation — that were so endearing —
real mashed potatoes, iced tea with every meal, homemade rolls on
Sunday, roses from her garden. Yes, even the embroidered sheets and pillowcases for going off to college. I hope we don’t forget that in our mechanized, mass-produced, off-the-shelf America.
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