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The Preacher’s Corner By Rev. Dr. Milton Winter No point in trying to sneak by censors yet again Last week when I stopped by The South Reporter
office to pick up my paper, the staff was waiting to pounce! I figured
they would, for I had submitted a column that contained a word that
cannot be published in a family newspaper. There is no point trying to
sneak by the censors yet again, but let’s just say that when I referred
to that cell phone that rang during a moment of intense pathos in a
movie theater I used a stronger word than “blasted” to describe it! Perhaps you feel the same way. Cell phone noise has become my new pet peeve, edging out flash photography at weddings. Anyhow
the ladies of the SR said they were trying to protect me in case some
of my church ladies are sensitive about “blue language.” I appreciate
the concern. Once, I was trying to vacuum up sawdust the carpenter had
left in our church. The bag on the vacuum was defective and it flew off
three times, spreading the dust further each time. Finally, thinking
myself alone in the empty church, I let loose a string of invective,
and it was at just that moment I heard one of my sweetest (but most
understanding) church ladies (Mrs. Sarah Hettinger) calling for me,
“Yoo-hoo!” If she heard my fit of temper she never let on. (However,
the church did soon purchase a new vacuum.) When
my friend Will’s son Paul was about four, the tot unleashed a tirade of
curse words. Moreover, Will says, the boy used the words “correctly.”
Startled, Will realized the genie was out of the bottle, so all he
could was gather up his son and explain to him that he must never say
those words in front of his mother. When reminded of the incident, all
Will’s wife Sally can say is that “he didn’t learn those words from me.” Some
things need to be cursed, and the only problem I have with cursing is
“wasting” a good oath on a situation that is not deserving. Cancer
needs to be cursed. Foolish wars and senseless gun violence need to be
cursed. Waste of precious natural resources needs to be cursed.
Misguided religious zealotry needs to be cursed. Poverty, hunger, and
injustice need to be cursed. Intolerance and racial discrimination need
to be cursed. Some would be nonplussed by the use
of profanity in God’s house. I do not recommend it, but in a committee
of our synod (the regional governing body of our denomination), an
elder of my acquaintance was having a terrible time explaining a point
to a minister on the committee. Finally the minister became so
frustrated he uttered an oath. Before he could apologize, the elder
roared, “Now, we can communicate!” They went on to a heated, but very
productive exchange of ideas. I promise to try
and express my thoughts for The South Reporter in more temperate
language, but I still like to think of what Queen Elizabeth said when
she was knighting several of her subjects in the Henry VII chapel of
Westminster Abbey. As one poor gentleman knelt to
vow everlasting fealty to his queen, his “blasted” cell phone went off.
Elizabeth lowered her sword and fixed a stony gaze. “We’d better stop
and let you answer that,” she said. “It might be something important!” |